How to Raise Confident Girls?

What do movie stars, like Eva Mendes and Sharon Stone, or Grammy award singers, like Celine Dion, and famous talk-show hosts like Oprah, have in common, besides being famous? In terms of self-esteem, they all have vivid memories, interesting and sometimes painful experiences, according to Shaun Robinson, co-host of the syndicated entertainment news show, Access Hollywood. and author of  the book, “Exactly as I am” “These women know that success doesn’t equal happiness, it comes from a much deeper place,” says

You see her every day interviewing celebrities and walking the red carpet. But behind the scenes, Shaun wants to reach out to not-so-famous people. “I noticed with increased frequency, girls would ask me, ‘Does so- and- so is beautiful as they are in the magazine or as perfect as they look on TV.’ I noticed girls were constantly more so than ever comparing themselves to the people they see on TV or in magazines,” says Robinson.

As a woman or if you have a girl at home, you must relate to the above comment; you would also agree with Shaun when she says,“We all suffer from self-esteem issue, whether you are 14 or 44 years old.”

As a sometimes contributor for “The Today Show,” “MSNBC,” “CNN” and many others, Shaun used her “access” to celebrities to help girls and decided to ask influential women more personal questions. “I asked them about their own struggles with self-esteem they had throughout the years; when they were little, teenagers, growing up.”

Why write the book?

Shaun is a board member of Girls Inc, an organization that focuses on teaching all girls to be strong, smart and bold. She’s also a member of various church and community organizations where she meets and talks to a lot of girls who many times measure beauty based on what they see on the big screen and magazines. “I gathered and hand picked women that I thought would be good role models for the girls, and give them advice on reaching into finding a place much deeper than what you see in the mirror and pulling from that, the strength that you need to battle all the challenges that you have as a young girl.”

“The Supergirl Dilemma”

According to a study conducted by  Girls Inc named “The Supergirl Dilemma,” of more than one thousand girls of various socioeconomic, racial and ethnic backgrounds,69 percent report being concerned about their appearance; 44 percent believe that the smartest girls in school are not popular. “They’re receiving so many messages on Television that tell them you don’t measure up to this, so therefore you’re not pretty or valuable.” “I think there has been no other time where girls have been given more messages about female empowerment but yet are still feeling so badly about themselves.”

 Celebrities also suffer

In the book ‘Exactly as I am”,  celebrated Women Share Candid Advice with Today’s Girls on What It Takes to Believe in Yourself, you’ll learn about why; 

Janet Jackson hated to look herself in the mirror, “I didn’t think I was pretty. I didn’t like my body. My level of confidence was very low.”

Could you imagine Iman, one of the most glamorous models in the world saying, “I hated looking so different from everyone else.”

What about the gorgeous Sharon Stone saying; “I didn’t think I was pretty until I was thirty-three years old.”

Or the international superstar Celine Dion saying; “I never felt like I was blending in with other kids. They had the jean of the moment and we couldn’t afford jeans or any nice clothing.”

Are we all supposed to look like a Barbie doll?

If an American girl, with white skin suffers from self-esteem, imagine a girl; with dark skin, from a different country or one with weight problems. “Skinny Jeans: I hate to use that term; I think the girls, they internalize that,” says Robinson.

They weren’t always Famous

She has made history in so many ways and it is the most famous talk-show host in the world. They say, “Whatever she touches she turns it into gold.” This is her adult life, but as a child, Oprah Winfrey  needed someone else to tell her how great she was to believe it: “I remember going home after church and staring at my self in the mirror, because a pretty lady has said to me that I was pretty,” says Oprah.

She is one of the sexiest movie stars, so you would never guess that growing up, Eva Mendes  suffered from rejection, “At that time, in my school, being of Latin descent wasn’t yet considered cool.” “I would often lie about my origins,” says Eva.

There are so many good examples of how girls can empower themselves, so I asked Shaun:

From all the celebrities you interviewed, who made the most significant impression on you?

“India.Arie is one of my favorite singers. She says, ‘Don’t worry if you don’t fit in the box that other people have said you need to fit into.’”Don’t try to be a cookie cutter “says Robinson.

The book ‘Exactly as I am’ is in many bookstores around the country, and is a great read, not only for girls of any age,  but also for moms, who can learn what their daughters struggle with everyday and might not talk about it.

I’m sure after reading this book and understanding your daughter’s behavior a little bit more you’ll be a proud Latina Mom!

Do you Think is harder to raise Confident girls or Confident Boys?

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